connection

April’s word is 유대감, or “connection.”

At the end of my first year in Korea, I discovered a slightly horrifying fact: the man for whom I’d worked for a full year thought I would enjoy pink wallpaper in my new apartment. Pink wallpaper. As in, the entirety of the room covered in pink. He looked truly surprised when I blurted out a very serious, “Are you kidding??” It was slightly funny at the time but also begged the question: did he know me at all?

Doubtful.

In Korea, particularly in the cities, what’s on the surface is very important. It’s all about image. Your personal image, your family’s image...everyone is concerned with everyone else’s perceptions of them. This leaves little room for honest human interaction or for deep relationships.

I was raised in a Mennonite environment in which interaction and relationships, and the community that they create, were a big part of life. Every Sunday was spent at church and Sunday school; weekend evenings often involved having company over for dinner and games. I have very fond memories of that, and in college it was something I wanted to continue having in my life. That’s a big part of why I ended up at EMU--I felt that sense of community when I visited the campus. The semesters I spent in Guatemala and Bolivia and in DC were intensified versions of happy feelings from my younger years, and, as such, were the highlights of my time at EMU.

Every foreigner in Korea has a different story that led them here--that becomes more evident to me the longer I’m here and the more people I meet. But arriving in a new place like this gives us all immediate common ground. Whatever constituted our communities at home didn’t make it into our luggage, and we all crave that missing piece in some measure after we get here. When we start to crave it, we reach for a variety of connections. Some are lucky to have Korean co-workers who are interested in learning and/or understand what it’s like to be a foreigner, and they form friendships. Others go to the bars to find a friend group there. Still others search for those with common interests like frisbee, potluck nights, or watching NFL game replays. As in any place, we form connections wherever we find them. What makes here (and living overseas in general) different is that the connections often have a time limit. Year-long contracts expire, people return home or change to a new job, and the dynamics of how we connect shift.

That’s why it’s important to value the bonds we create while we have them. Whether they stay within this peninsula for a year or for just a few months, they all have something to offer us--something as simple as fun times outside on a sunny weekend, or something as deep as a close friendship that lasts beyond the limits of the time that overlaps. If we’re lucky enough, we find both through one connection. During my year in Seoul, I had a co-worker, Kate (Soojin) who kind of took me under her wing. She helped me study the language, took me and some others to her family’s home, and taught me tons about Korea. I have her to thank for so much that I love about this country. And during my first year in Busan, I met my good friend Carly. She was working part-time at my academy, and took me out on my first weekend to introduce me to her friends. That group became like a family over the course of the next several months, and we spent a lot of our free time together on evenings and weekends. It was really awesome to find that overseas.

If we are even luckier, the connections we make here continue after we’ve left Korea. Both Kate and I and the group that I mentioned still stay in touch--there were friendships created of the kind that aren’t lessened by distance or time. Several of us happened to be in the same area of the U.S. over New Year’s last year, and spent it together; hanging out felt like it had before we’d gone our separate ways. This happens sometimes here: people form relationships (between two individuals or with many) that, although they may disperse or change, are tied together by their shared experiences long after the original shape of the bond is gone. I know several people for whom this has been the case, and it’s so important that we all realize and appreciate how special it is to find that in a country that is not our own.

I hope you all are having a wonderful spring! I definitely am enjoying it here. Below are pictures from the past several months. Enjoy! I love and miss you all.

Love,
Heather


A mixture of photos from October through March:
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.544537826159.2026889.148800130&type=3&l=d0a10d857e
Trip to Seoul on Lunar New Year weekend:
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.544868782919.2026926.148800130&type=3&l=cd1c6755b9
Spring activities with my new kindies:
https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.544914186929.2026936.148800130&type=3&l=dcdd993d8a